The Dork Side: I’m Breaking Up With GLEE

Damian McGinty, Kevin McHale and Vanessa Lengies in GLEE - Season 3 - "Heart" | ©2012 Fox/Adam Rose

Teen weddings, texting while driving accidents, suicide attempts: When did GLEE turn into ONE GLEE HILL? I’m sorry, GLEE, but it’s over between us. I’m breaking up with you. I do appreciate GLEE. I understand what it is you’re trying to do. It usually sends a positive message about acceptance and understanding. I don’t love the message it sends to young girls, which is that boys are everything and should be the center of their worlds. But, on the whole, the show means well. I get it. I don’t know exactly when GLEE lost me. It happened gradually. I used […]Read On »

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The Dork Side takes on movie trailers including THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN, THE SMURFS and more

Andrew Garfield is Spider-Man in THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN | ©2011 Sony Pictures/Marvel

Sometimes the best thing about going to the movies is seeing the movie trailers. Other times … not so much. Here are five movie previews that I watched so you don’t have to. THE SMURFS From the director of BIG MOMMA’S HOUSE and SCOOBY-DOO is another movie that will make you make you wish you were never born. This movie looks so smurfin’ bad. I would rather eat a smurfin’ gun than see it. Neil Patrick Harris deserves better than this. THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN OK, I’m not going to lie to you, dear readers. I am going to see this […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: Shut up about the Netflix price hike, you whiny crybabies

Netflix logo | ©Netflix

I can’t believe all these people are complaining about the Netflix price hike. Seriously? You’re losing your damn minds about $6. $6?! Meanwhile, the Republicans are stripping all of us of our health care. Try going to a Planned Parenthood in New Hampshire. Oh wait, you can’t. There still isn’t equal rights in this country for the gays, but yeah, this Netflix thing is a big deal – let’s all freak out. Come on, people, you can’t get everything for free. You get Google for free. You get Facebook for free. You get Twitter for free. You get YouTube for […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: 5 Reasons THE VOICE is better than AMERICAN IDOL

THE VOICE - Season 1 poster | ©2011 NBC

I used to love AMERICAN IDOL. I watched every season. Well, except for this last one. I quit AMERICAN IDOL cold turkey this year, and I never looked back. Honestly, I thought THE VOICE was going to be a lame IDOL ripoff. Instead it has turned out to be a pleasant surprise, addressing many of my problems with AMERICAN IDOL. Not only do I like THE VOICE, I think it is superior to AMERICAN IDOL. Here are the five reasons I think THE VOICE is better than AMERICAN IDOL. 1. THE VOICE isn’t sentimental. No one made it through the […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: Kim Kardashian is engaged – will the wedding will be televised?

Kim Kardashian in KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS | ©2011 E!

I hope you are enjoying your three-day weekend. I know I’m enjoying mine. With all the regular TV season pretty much wrapped up I actually have time to see my friends and family. I was thinking about seeing THE HANGOVER II this weekend, but then I realized that I don’t hate myself. Let’s get on with this week’s Dork Side: In a match made in E! heaven, Kim Kardashian is engaged to NBA player Kris Humphries. Everyone is wondering how long the marriage will last. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess six to eight episodes. In […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: The problem with GLEE and its real “agenda”

Cory Monteith, Dianna Agron and Lea Michele in GLEE - Season 2 - "Night of Neglect" | ©2011 Fox/Adam Rose

I like GLEE. I really do, but, I have a problem with it, and I want you to know that I criticize it, because I care. Conservative pundits have been ranting about the supposed gay agenda the show is pushing, which is completely ridiculous. Of course, several media outlets ran with the story even though it’s total crap. There is no gay agenda. It’s just a TV show that treats its gay characters like actual human beings. “Gay people are people, too. Film at 11.” GLEE (which airs its Season 2 finale tonight) does a lot of things right. It […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: Fox goes on a TV show killing spree and Bristol Palin gets “corrective surgery”

Jason Clarke and Matt Lauria in THE CHICAGO CODE - Season 1 - "Gillis, Chase and Baby Face" | ©2011 Fox/Jeffrey Garland

I’ve got a lot of snark that I need to unload on you people, so let’s just get right to it, shall we? • Oprah has confirmed that Will Smith and Jada Pickett Smith will be guests on her final show on May 25. I assume the final show also includes a time machine that takes everyone back to 1997 when this would have been awesome. • Bristol Palin stepped out last week with a whole new face.However, she is claiming she didn’t have plastic surgery. She had “corrective jaw surgery.” And just in time for her new reality show. […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: Let’s blame everything on TEEN MOM

TEEN MOM logo | ©2011 MTV

Of course, the big news this week is that I’m knocked up. Yes, The Dork Side is going to have a spawn. I blame MTV’s TEEN MOM. They make it all look so glamorous. I do not foresee this whole pregnancy thing affecting The Dork Side. Maybe I’m wrong. Perhaps a year from now this column will be all about YO GABBA GABBA and SESAME STREET. In the meantime, it’s time to let the snark out of her cage: * I guess there is no such thing as bad publicity. Singer-turned-violent-douchebag Chris Brown’s album debuted at No. 1 on the […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: Come On, Get Happy

Donald Trump in THE CELEBRITY APPRENTICE | ©NBC/Virginia Sherwood

There is a lot of bad news right now. I think we could all use a little cheering up, so I’ve composed a list of things that we can be all be happy about: There’s no law that forces us to watch CELEBRITY APPRENTICE … yet. Celebrities will always film themselves doin’ it and take naked photos of themselves, and act shocked and embarrassed when they are “leaked” to the media, giving us things to stealthily look at and read about while we pretend to work in our cubicles. Carson Daly’s LAST CALL has been renewed for an 11th season, […]Read On »

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The Dork Side: This is a Charlie Sheen-free zone

Charlie Sheen at the 2006 Summer CBS Party at the Television Critics | ©2006 Sue Schneider

For your reading pleasure, I present to you an entirely 100 percent Charlie Sheen-free column (well, except for the headling and the photo to the left). Don’t say I don’t ever do anything nice for you. And you’re welcome. ‘VOICE’ OF REASON Singer Christina Aguilera has signed on to be a judge on NBC’s AMERICAN IDOL rip-off THE VOICE. Considering she’s been spending most of her week in front of a judge, this is a big step up for Aguilera. This is great news for the contestants, too. Finally, someone can give them useful real-world advice about how to behave […]Read On »

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